I had to check!

So there is this blowing wind causing all manner of havoc with the ventilation in the hut, taking into account my decidedly ill-advised decision to vent my aggression on the slab, and make a new doorway... for the wind; and then there is the fact that, as soon as I blog something, I am getting pageviews by the number, and so, I got suspicious, and decided that, since the Indians are in town and the cafe opens till late for them to skype their families, I MUST find out if the 'pageviews' are due to me tracking my own pageviews or not... so, here I am, and apparently, some Americans, and South Africans are really keen on my 'spiel', and I am getting a bit curious, here.Because, you see, I get no feedback, even locally; I do not know if what I 'see' is factual or not, or if my conclusions have validity with what is happening in people's lives, because NOTHING is as frustrating as living in one's own head, and getting all the answers there.
I hate masturbation, and this smacks of just THAT, cerebral gratification.
Somebody better DO  something, or I am going to start putting things to the test now, in a destructive manner!
Starting with Butt-head!

I just watched the HULK trailer, and finally, everything came into focus... GOD made me like this, not anyone else, and for reasons of His own has made me an indestructible... THING... that can go through walls, and do indescribable harm, and that is not the half of it:-
From being distinctly uninvolved in life, I have discovered a deep cavern that stores all manner of pains and hurt that I have suffered, and unleashes them a million-fold, and for the first time I am teetering on the brink of becoming even BIGGER than I thought, because so far I have been looking only INWARD, at my own heart and my immediate surroundings, but now, the pent up fury is coming  out, and... people are going to start dying, because, as I have repeatedly said before, "NO ONE has ever seen the like of what is about to happen"
I am not only unique, I find that I do not KNOW myself at all, but that everyday I refuse to compromise I pass even greater barriers of human endurance and capacity, and the weird thing is I know that no one, not even me, is going to be happy, even for a long time, but MAYBE, at the end of it all, there will be some kind of ... sense... to all this, because frankly
I am ANGRY
And God is no help; He says He sees me, and therefore He is aware of what lurks beneath the surface, and somehow, WANTS it out in the open:

First time He said that in a long while, "about seeing me", was when I decided on my revenge on Sam for the way he treated me; and just now, I had hacked into his facebook account to see if I could get tabs on the girl Jumana, who I think would be the perfect form of revenge, because she is beautiful, and inaccessible to the idiot.


And God APPROVED!
Especially the fact that she is eye candy, and would be under no threat herself, since I would not be able to harm her, but would use her beauty to calm myself, since otherwise I would be coming back to the guy, Sam, and keeping on needling him till he snaps and I finally do GBH to him, which is, for me, just a trifle too... easy!

He must suffer, as should those that dared look down on me, and only when I am done will I give it all a rest, since I can not forget, nor do I find it worthwhile to let a person know what they have done wrong to me till I have already decided what manner of punishment to mete out.