Better than any Substitute

The song has the words:-

its not easy being homeless
sometimes you have fi do what you have fi do
and he didn't have a mom or dad
to help him get through
he said
"help me, Father help me!"
and he looked up to the sky
and he heard a Voice reply:
When you cry I cry
I cry along with you
when you smile I smile
I smile along with you

I never thought these words could ever be... personal... or exclusive, till I was taken through the grilling of life and had, one by one, all my assumptions on fairness and 'quality of life' stripped away, and realised that I can not afford to have any person or being in my corner. AT this moment, though I lived in a mansion, surrounded by everything and all that any man could want, I would still be homeless, and lost:
Only God would suffice, ONLY God would be able to see me through, because, literally, every person and everything that walks on this planet, IS an enemy.
My life means less than nothing without Him as the source of everything, and I have never been more aware of my NEED for Him for my daily sustenance as at this moment, when I am looking to Him for my... continued existence.
I have gone through all who were in my corner, and all that expect me to do things that would make THEM happy, or comfortable, in their lives, and found that I can not bear to even do as they expect.
because if I bend in the slightest, even to those that presumably are well-disposed towards me, I will end up entangled in the lies I have been trying to extricate myself from all this time.
I do not love any person. I am hostile towards all of you, and I frankly hate every single living thing, simply because you are all alive.
I was wondering what it would take to get  things to change, and I found out as I got off the train this morning that I have to merely acknowledge the truth, the truth that I would sooner see all of you dead than have any of you in my life, because with any of you in my life my life gets complicated, and wearying.

guess the point to it all is, PSALM 73 is the true interpretation of the vision:

Psalm 73: 1-28 speaks my own heart so clearly that I do not need to have anything more to say.
There isa line from a rather melancholy song that I have kept within me and at times let out, to God:-

And I...

I am lost without YOU.

And I...

I am desperate for YOU.

I NEED God, more than anything. Nothing and nobody matters even in comparison. I would rather lose everything and find Him, than try to settle for the rubbish that people have to offer, or the rubbish the people ARE.