when them see you them know everything fine...
from you love woman inna the air hand fir go
Mere?girl me have r driving inna me Prado
when they come and dance sitting upper shansho?
help me sing
hiyahiya yo
girl them are tell me say they love me flow
and me ver' sweet and got stamina-ooh
girl from your shoes nuh squeeze at all
help me sing
hiya hiya yo
girl them bubble and girl them are wine
bashment girl each up inna front line
vidoe light shine girl hitch up behind
cant stop a girl cause I move on time...
bla bla..
when them see you them know everything fine
from you love woman inna the air hand fir go
Mere?girl me have r driving inna me Prado
when they come and dance sitting upper shansho?
help me sing
hiyahiya yo
girl them are tell me say they love me flow
and me ver' sweet and got stamina-ooh
girl from your shoes nuh squeeze at all
help me sing
hiya hiya yo
girl them bubble and girl them are wine
bashment girl each up inna front line
vidoe light shine girl hitch up behind
cant stop a girl cause I move on time...
bla bla..
when them see you them know everything fine
Ok, so, since I am trying to de-animosify some of the statements God made a lot and I just took it the way I wanted and ... blew up... I thought I would bring out some of the lyrics of the song by hawkeye that made me go over the edge yesterday... or helped me go over the edge, because, as I have been pointing out, there is nothing comfortable about having God anywhere in my life.
now, 'hawkeye' immediately brings to mind eyes of a hawk, then I will first of all consider that there are people who were looking from their eyries, like eagles, or hawks [just looked it up now, and it applies to hawks as well] and so these were people who saw from their... nests, houses, and didnt come and try to mix with me, because it was enough for them to just 'see' me from a distance?
because, you see, i was giving God a rather jaundiced eye yesterday, since I had figured out that my double fixation with the blonde chick and the red-headed chick was me trying to wipe out of my memory the picture of butt-head's younger sister, since i had firmly determined to destroy the fools and she had the same nose as chunky boy, another guy I am going to kill, yeah, but anyway, I was just briefly focusing on the two women who pissed me off yesterday, and every time I did so, God would quote the words of the poem, which Hemingway made famous in his book "For Whom The Bell Tolls":-
now, 'hawkeye' immediately brings to mind eyes of a hawk, then I will first of all consider that there are people who were looking from their eyries, like eagles, or hawks [just looked it up now, and it applies to hawks as well] and so these were people who saw from their... nests, houses, and didnt come and try to mix with me, because it was enough for them to just 'see' me from a distance?
because, you see, i was giving God a rather jaundiced eye yesterday, since I had figured out that my double fixation with the blonde chick and the red-headed chick was me trying to wipe out of my memory the picture of butt-head's younger sister, since i had firmly determined to destroy the fools and she had the same nose as chunky boy, another guy I am going to kill, yeah, but anyway, I was just briefly focusing on the two women who pissed me off yesterday, and every time I did so, God would quote the words of the poem, which Hemingway made famous in his book "For Whom The Bell Tolls":-
therefore never send to know
for whom the bell tolls
it tolls for thee
And since the custom in some medieval English towns was , in the case of a dignitary's death, a church bell would toll and a child would be sent to the church to discover who had died, in this case God was pointing out that He was not going to stand in my way if I decided to kill them because by their presumption, the two women 'sent to know' for whom the bell tolled and it was tolling for them instead, because no one is safe from me unless they do as I please, and NEVER change and relax thinking that I care so much that I will allow bullshit, or someone walking all over me because she thinks that I will go easy on her... or anyone of hers.OK, now that I have that out of the way, I will carry on with digging deep and bringing up the whole sordid story of just what the fuck i think when I see things.
When I left home and my parents place, i took care to take every paper identifying me, and everything that I had achieved academically and been certified for,and wasted no opportunity to get rid of these things because there was NO way I was going to be an 'academic', if THAT was what God had in store for me.And when I got here ,in South Africa, on the very same day, as I have specified, as the current chairman of the anc and president of the country went to the meeting that got him elected, of course, i would have laughed if anyone had said that 'race issues' would ever play a part in my life, because I was just in lock-up mode, and had nothing that I wanted from anyone, since God had so conclusively proved that He was pushing His own agenda and I was stuck in life against my will, and would never escape, except maybe when the 15 years he had ... added ... to my life, came to an end.
So, i became a drifter, and never bothered about myself, even from the time i was in De Doorns and ended up in Cape Town, and mixed with the drug dealer and started having sex, after a two year hiatus.
but then, while I saw that things were way too easy, I had at the back of my mind a vision that God had sent me when I had just been newly in CapeTown, the one I explained about the Uefa Champions League, and the Zimbabwe cricket team captain at the time one prosper utseya.
but since it seemed God had done what He did to Hezekiah and I was free to fritter away my life as I pleased for the remainder of the years He had just... decided ... would be mine, I did not care.
in fact, I must point out that I grew up some, because now that my mother was nowhere in the accessible picture I could stop being so bitter at her and just concentrate on not letting God anywhere near me.
yeah right!
It all came crushing down spectacularly, from both the sources that I had thought were never going to slip my guard. It had NOTHING, I repeat, NOTHING to do with the coloured girlfriend of the time.I bought a phone with my blood money, a Nokia N80, for ME the best phone there ever was, because I could load music on it and on the memory card without having to go through some of the silly things one has to do with other phones, and since I never slid it up or down too much, I never worried about the belt being torn, till I got involved with the stupid girl and her kid damaged it.
What I loved especially about the phone was that whoever had owned it before he was either robbed of it [trust me,it was a he, not a she] or had it stolen from him, had loaded the Liverpool Theme, with the "you will never walk alone " motto, and phoenix [that should have warned me ] but i took no heed to it, and
just loved the thing.Especially the way the empty stadium would show up when one started playing music;- it does not show there. But then, things went completely downhill the moment one of "Brother's" workers, a guy called Harry, got his hands on the Uefa theme song as a ring tone and I, without much thought about it, decided that I would use that as my main ring tone,and it was only when I had done so that half the circle was complete, and I found out that the... stupid dream thing I had brushed off was really coming knocking, in reality.
And I started going downhill from that moment, and went into total suicidal mode.
before, I had been just a lackadaiscal playboy, just dabbling in life and no committing to anything, but from then on, the dormant territorial person went into over-drive.
When I left home and my parents place, i took care to take every paper identifying me, and everything that I had achieved academically and been certified for,and wasted no opportunity to get rid of these things because there was NO way I was going to be an 'academic', if THAT was what God had in store for me.And when I got here ,in South Africa, on the very same day, as I have specified, as the current chairman of the anc and president of the country went to the meeting that got him elected, of course, i would have laughed if anyone had said that 'race issues' would ever play a part in my life, because I was just in lock-up mode, and had nothing that I wanted from anyone, since God had so conclusively proved that He was pushing His own agenda and I was stuck in life against my will, and would never escape, except maybe when the 15 years he had ... added ... to my life, came to an end.
So, i became a drifter, and never bothered about myself, even from the time i was in De Doorns and ended up in Cape Town, and mixed with the drug dealer and started having sex, after a two year hiatus.
but then, while I saw that things were way too easy, I had at the back of my mind a vision that God had sent me when I had just been newly in CapeTown, the one I explained about the Uefa Champions League, and the Zimbabwe cricket team captain at the time one prosper utseya.
but since it seemed God had done what He did to Hezekiah and I was free to fritter away my life as I pleased for the remainder of the years He had just... decided ... would be mine, I did not care.
in fact, I must point out that I grew up some, because now that my mother was nowhere in the accessible picture I could stop being so bitter at her and just concentrate on not letting God anywhere near me.
yeah right!
It all came crushing down spectacularly, from both the sources that I had thought were never going to slip my guard. It had NOTHING, I repeat, NOTHING to do with the coloured girlfriend of the time.I bought a phone with my blood money, a Nokia N80, for ME the best phone there ever was, because I could load music on it and on the memory card without having to go through some of the silly things one has to do with other phones, and since I never slid it up or down too much, I never worried about the belt being torn, till I got involved with the stupid girl and her kid damaged it.
What I loved especially about the phone was that whoever had owned it before he was either robbed of it [trust me,it was a he, not a she] or had it stolen from him, had loaded the Liverpool Theme, with the "you will never walk alone " motto, and phoenix [that should have warned me ] but i took no heed to it, and
And I started going downhill from that moment, and went into total suicidal mode.
 |
| I was born in 1982, and just look when the 'you will never walk alone team was established! |
At the same time, my mother, feeling neglected, decided to give my phone number to my cousin, the same asshole I am going to kill, justice/justin as he calls himself and he came in over the phone with a vengeance and brought everything crushing down on me, all the memories that I had so carefully stored away and I found that I could never ever forget.
Which is when I looked for ways to die, and seemingly chucked away everything 'for a woman'.
And imagine my amazement when I tried to hang myself and NOTHING happened,or the bitterness I feel even now when I , later, after all the Valkernberg bullshit I tried to drink poison and God, even as I took it to my lips, drily commented "they shall drink any deadly thing and it shall not harm them", and that made me weep tears of frustration, because the jaws kept on being tightly locked with me in them.
and made me seem like I was just ... playing... at suicide.
BUT
I admit that I was stunned when, at Valkenberg, when I was there and almost catatonic, knowing that the stigma of mental incompetence never leaves anyone, I encountered this quite good looking red haired chick who it seemed hid behind this tall guy she was with and would not face life alone, as if there was somthing wrong with her. So, while I did NOT say anything to her the first time we met, but , trying to ... identify myself (and maybe get some kind of feeling for what I wanted in life, if there was any such thing)... I talked mostly to the guy but kept ALL my attention on her, till I saw her relax and enter into the conversation, as if, as i thought then, she had decided I would not bite.
then I blew them away by saying, when I had not done it yet, that I had solved th Goldbach Conjecture and I wanted to do something ... different.. like prove to the world that God did really did make the world.
why did I say that?
I had given up.
God had won, in my eyes.
There was no escaping Him, and He would do to me what He did to Nebuchadnezzar, and make me eat the very grass if need be, till I could look up to Him and acknowledge that He had all the power and all the might.
so I may as well start now, even if my heart was not in it.
the guy took my words at face value, and started bringing me christian literature, but the chick came alone, and when I told her that her companion had given me christian books, she replied, surprisingly, "john? Oh, he is a sweet kid!", and when I spoke of the physical examination that the doctor on duty the time I had come had given me,and he had fondled my dick and I was not so sure that THAT was allowed, where does one draw the line, she did not answer me directly, but confirmed what I had suspected that he was indeed a pervert, a homo, and then when I realised that she had actualy established a... bond ... with me and was enjoying my company, I did not have the heart to play with her feelings and so, I drew back, because where was the future in it? I was a hollow man, nothing inside, and so, did not want to break her heart, or give her false hope, and it was on the tip of my tongue to tell her I was... dying... when she forestalled that by asking me her first direct question, about whether I spoke Afrikaans, and when i replied in English as she had said, she launched into a flow of soothing speech in the tongue, and when I just sat there like a zombie she then asked me in Afrikaans whether I spoke only a littlee and i replied in the same language that I did.
as I have figured out now,she had detected that I am...afraid... of female laughter.Or gaiety.
REALLY. Because I remember when my mother would laugh as she tortured me, and it would be like the funniest thing in the world, or when some other kid among my numerous relatives, including the same justin(to whom I owe a twisted left hand, because it bent but did not break when he swept my feet from under me as a kid and I landed on it, but had to wear a cast all the same), and she would think I deserved it. I promised myself I would not cut my hair till I was in a place of my own, but if i did not, I would show the depression in the middle of my head that I got when she was in an excess of frenzy and I ... bumped... into the handle of her ward robe unit and it literally sank in, and I never felt it but just ran away when she stopped for a moment, thinking I would die.
so, yeah, I am afraid when a woman laughs,or a woman speaks up harshly, but this time, because there does not loom for me any woman as huge as my mother as I was kid, the anger,which is the initial reaction, morphes into anger, and a need to retaliate.
[this is the reason I was so... grateful to the polite chick I mentioned only briefly yesterday because when the 'i-know-it-all' chick started speaking so harshly at the library while I was trying to stop my ears by bringing that 'noise' that comes to them when one thinks 'liquid' into them, and she immediately started speaking into the phone and turned my attention to her and she was so much better to look at than the girl with her short hair. BUT what I had no explanation for THEN was just how the fuck it happened that the moment I went int my... tormented mode... EVERYONE went quiet like a frozen video, and everyone was very still.]
I left Valkenberg without establishing anylink with the girl, but NOW that I know more about my... mortality... I do want her with me.
She is the woman who was the first of the second storey, the kind I can not just walk off of. Or is it away from.NO, I prefer my own take.
then there was the girl I met on the train, who, without saying a singke word to me, refusing to speak at all to me so that even now I wonder if she is mute, though God would not do that to me would He? Nuh, He would not. Because I could not stand it.
anyway, she showed me her underwear, and I did not have to be a rocket scientist to figure out what she was 'saying'.
But I did not want to hurt her, and I was so sure that I would never live any type of life that would cause her to even look twice at me, but as i said, now it is different.
Then there was the girl that depressed me, at the beach, in S/Town, when she walked with her hips swinging so provocatively, and I wondered, forgetting my circumstances,if she would ever look twice at someone like me, or if to her black people were relegated to something like in the movies, as sidekicks, I was surprised when she shoved a stick under the tent I used as a door, ran off and then just stood there while I looked her over and she was smiling, and when I wondered whether the guy with her was her boyfriend, the guy seemed to read THAT and he shoved an arm away as if to distance himself from her.
NOW, my question is, a guy could SEE that I was reaching my tentacles to a woman and read that I was on the verge of destroying her and him if they were in any involved, and react that way... and WHY?
And my anger was FIRST, or would have been directed at, a woman, and THEN at the guy, and again, it is easy to see why, right?
My MOTHER.
And the reason why my... companion ever got manifested to begin with was because a woman pissed me off, and so, the only reason he will manifest again is as I take out my anger on another woman who pissed me off... and then somemore.
so, michelle, you are very, very, very dead.
then there was the Dutch girl, and the fact that she also separated herself from the guy, and the reason it did not bother her that he was with her as a travelling companion was something I had to figure out, as I saw his anger against women and his unlikely figure.
And the woman would not leave without seeing me.
then there was also the ravishingly smiling woman, who seemed to be smiling at the queer librarian at Fish Hoek library, but then... you see where I am going with this?
Now, I had reached this point when the German girl verana showed up, and her coming out showed butt-head's mom's thoughts, and I knew that the woman was really dissing me and I left the place, and figured out that I was good to go with the sixteen females.
But then, the sabbath walker texas ranger vision had not been fufilled, and i had started to pay attention to these nonsense things,since they had become rather ...real.
Then,of course I met this girl at the beach in Fish Hoek, looked and looked away, and then had her come and display herself for me, and it took me figuring that I was worried at the time by the other girl who had the funny gap between her legs to realise that this girl was not going to be one of those I just oggle and then go busy myself with in some covert bush somewhere;- I actually COULD have her because she was offering herself to me, although she had no idea about the other things I was up to.
Around this time, with me worrying about the texas ranger vision, there showed up this woman who, to be blunt, looked down at me and thought I needed a head examination, and invited me to come to church.
And well, I .... tried... to put her in a good light, but I found that I could not look her in the face, but the moment her daughter showed up, it was instant lust from me, and I actually ignored the woman and did not even see her till she came the second time.
And I wanted to cast away that daughter because of something or other, till I saw that woman and as I said she reminded me that I had really wanted that chick, especially those legs of hers, yessss!
then there showed up this english chick from cornwall who at first glance tried to be friendly but I suspect that she was trying to sucker me in, and when I found that her appearance put me off, I remember saying so what now to God, and this very slim but shapely blonde chick with the round Scottish voice, which even now to my memory is quite sweet, showed up, with the 'employment' statement.
That was the LAST time I was idle,or just pushing things along.because allison, maybe having read about the 'replacement' for her in this other woman whose legs I had compared to hers, decided to come with her own statement about, "Am I too early", and the link between THAT and the 'I'm too late' statement was too much to be coincidental.
And I went berserk.
till that time I had not worried much about anything, but when this woman who ignored me totally and took me like a fool and became on my guard and so, when this other woman showed up, and she won me over by her ... neglect.. of her kids and her very sexy appearance, and then she offered herself to me, I was really liking it.
Then that sunday I end up at the olympia cafe and she, seeing how things stand, decided to come out and clean her act, I saw, and decided to let it ride,but her act actually made me less angry with allison than I had been, and I thought that she could actually be less 'unclean' than this chick,so,when she showed up again, and again tried to disrupt my program with her self-importance, and I was further annoyed with her, I thought that at least she had stopped being too sure of herself, although if she ever tries to disrupt a program of mine ever again, I will KILL her, because I am fed up with her bullshit.
Anyway, that Sunday, when I had been pissed off, I saw this french lady who made up my mind for me that I could never have anything to do with the squid -chick who deliberately showed me up when she was the one who had come into my life, and now wanted to ... correct me?
Well, I decided she would die.
and then finally came the woman with her bland face and stunning body, and sweet smile, who only showed up when I decided that I would NOT have butt-head's mom anywhere near me, seeming respect or not.
And I decided that she would die, as well as her brood.
SOthese are the seven and three of the second tier, with the girl with the hail-mary mother as the bonus virgin.
Fuck, if she is NOT a virgin, then it would not be worth it to... spare her when she was privy to her mom's schemes and participated in them. Not even for her legs, no.Now, I am declaring the whole list done, the first ten, the second ten, and the five and one.
Now, I wonder if allison, the one I have a beedy eye on, because as far as I am concerned she is rather uncertain because I have had so much bullshit from HER which seems to point out that the woman really thinks I am an insect or some such thing.Well, I remember thinking about why she used to show up whenever I was on the road from Claremont and walking from Glencairn, and the one time the thing was I got this reply:-
Which is when I looked for ways to die, and seemingly chucked away everything 'for a woman'.
And imagine my amazement when I tried to hang myself and NOTHING happened,or the bitterness I feel even now when I , later, after all the Valkernberg bullshit I tried to drink poison and God, even as I took it to my lips, drily commented "they shall drink any deadly thing and it shall not harm them", and that made me weep tears of frustration, because the jaws kept on being tightly locked with me in them.
and made me seem like I was just ... playing... at suicide.
BUT
I admit that I was stunned when, at Valkenberg, when I was there and almost catatonic, knowing that the stigma of mental incompetence never leaves anyone, I encountered this quite good looking red haired chick who it seemed hid behind this tall guy she was with and would not face life alone, as if there was somthing wrong with her. So, while I did NOT say anything to her the first time we met, but , trying to ... identify myself (and maybe get some kind of feeling for what I wanted in life, if there was any such thing)... I talked mostly to the guy but kept ALL my attention on her, till I saw her relax and enter into the conversation, as if, as i thought then, she had decided I would not bite.
then I blew them away by saying, when I had not done it yet, that I had solved th Goldbach Conjecture and I wanted to do something ... different.. like prove to the world that God did really did make the world.
why did I say that?
I had given up.
God had won, in my eyes.
There was no escaping Him, and He would do to me what He did to Nebuchadnezzar, and make me eat the very grass if need be, till I could look up to Him and acknowledge that He had all the power and all the might.
so I may as well start now, even if my heart was not in it.
the guy took my words at face value, and started bringing me christian literature, but the chick came alone, and when I told her that her companion had given me christian books, she replied, surprisingly, "john? Oh, he is a sweet kid!", and when I spoke of the physical examination that the doctor on duty the time I had come had given me,and he had fondled my dick and I was not so sure that THAT was allowed, where does one draw the line, she did not answer me directly, but confirmed what I had suspected that he was indeed a pervert, a homo, and then when I realised that she had actualy established a... bond ... with me and was enjoying my company, I did not have the heart to play with her feelings and so, I drew back, because where was the future in it? I was a hollow man, nothing inside, and so, did not want to break her heart, or give her false hope, and it was on the tip of my tongue to tell her I was... dying... when she forestalled that by asking me her first direct question, about whether I spoke Afrikaans, and when i replied in English as she had said, she launched into a flow of soothing speech in the tongue, and when I just sat there like a zombie she then asked me in Afrikaans whether I spoke only a littlee and i replied in the same language that I did.
as I have figured out now,she had detected that I am...afraid... of female laughter.Or gaiety.
REALLY. Because I remember when my mother would laugh as she tortured me, and it would be like the funniest thing in the world, or when some other kid among my numerous relatives, including the same justin(to whom I owe a twisted left hand, because it bent but did not break when he swept my feet from under me as a kid and I landed on it, but had to wear a cast all the same), and she would think I deserved it. I promised myself I would not cut my hair till I was in a place of my own, but if i did not, I would show the depression in the middle of my head that I got when she was in an excess of frenzy and I ... bumped... into the handle of her ward robe unit and it literally sank in, and I never felt it but just ran away when she stopped for a moment, thinking I would die.
so, yeah, I am afraid when a woman laughs,or a woman speaks up harshly, but this time, because there does not loom for me any woman as huge as my mother as I was kid, the anger,which is the initial reaction, morphes into anger, and a need to retaliate.
[this is the reason I was so... grateful to the polite chick I mentioned only briefly yesterday because when the 'i-know-it-all' chick started speaking so harshly at the library while I was trying to stop my ears by bringing that 'noise' that comes to them when one thinks 'liquid' into them, and she immediately started speaking into the phone and turned my attention to her and she was so much better to look at than the girl with her short hair. BUT what I had no explanation for THEN was just how the fuck it happened that the moment I went int my... tormented mode... EVERYONE went quiet like a frozen video, and everyone was very still.]
I left Valkenberg without establishing anylink with the girl, but NOW that I know more about my... mortality... I do want her with me.
She is the woman who was the first of the second storey, the kind I can not just walk off of. Or is it away from.NO, I prefer my own take.
then there was the girl I met on the train, who, without saying a singke word to me, refusing to speak at all to me so that even now I wonder if she is mute, though God would not do that to me would He? Nuh, He would not. Because I could not stand it.
anyway, she showed me her underwear, and I did not have to be a rocket scientist to figure out what she was 'saying'.
But I did not want to hurt her, and I was so sure that I would never live any type of life that would cause her to even look twice at me, but as i said, now it is different.
Then there was the girl that depressed me, at the beach, in S/Town, when she walked with her hips swinging so provocatively, and I wondered, forgetting my circumstances,if she would ever look twice at someone like me, or if to her black people were relegated to something like in the movies, as sidekicks, I was surprised when she shoved a stick under the tent I used as a door, ran off and then just stood there while I looked her over and she was smiling, and when I wondered whether the guy with her was her boyfriend, the guy seemed to read THAT and he shoved an arm away as if to distance himself from her.
NOW, my question is, a guy could SEE that I was reaching my tentacles to a woman and read that I was on the verge of destroying her and him if they were in any involved, and react that way... and WHY?
And my anger was FIRST, or would have been directed at, a woman, and THEN at the guy, and again, it is easy to see why, right?
My MOTHER.
And the reason why my... companion ever got manifested to begin with was because a woman pissed me off, and so, the only reason he will manifest again is as I take out my anger on another woman who pissed me off... and then somemore.
so, michelle, you are very, very, very dead.
then there was the Dutch girl, and the fact that she also separated herself from the guy, and the reason it did not bother her that he was with her as a travelling companion was something I had to figure out, as I saw his anger against women and his unlikely figure.
And the woman would not leave without seeing me.
then there was also the ravishingly smiling woman, who seemed to be smiling at the queer librarian at Fish Hoek library, but then... you see where I am going with this?
Now, I had reached this point when the German girl verana showed up, and her coming out showed butt-head's mom's thoughts, and I knew that the woman was really dissing me and I left the place, and figured out that I was good to go with the sixteen females.
But then, the sabbath walker texas ranger vision had not been fufilled, and i had started to pay attention to these nonsense things,since they had become rather ...real.
Then,of course I met this girl at the beach in Fish Hoek, looked and looked away, and then had her come and display herself for me, and it took me figuring that I was worried at the time by the other girl who had the funny gap between her legs to realise that this girl was not going to be one of those I just oggle and then go busy myself with in some covert bush somewhere;- I actually COULD have her because she was offering herself to me, although she had no idea about the other things I was up to.
Around this time, with me worrying about the texas ranger vision, there showed up this woman who, to be blunt, looked down at me and thought I needed a head examination, and invited me to come to church.
And well, I .... tried... to put her in a good light, but I found that I could not look her in the face, but the moment her daughter showed up, it was instant lust from me, and I actually ignored the woman and did not even see her till she came the second time.
And I wanted to cast away that daughter because of something or other, till I saw that woman and as I said she reminded me that I had really wanted that chick, especially those legs of hers, yessss!
then there showed up this english chick from cornwall who at first glance tried to be friendly but I suspect that she was trying to sucker me in, and when I found that her appearance put me off, I remember saying so what now to God, and this very slim but shapely blonde chick with the round Scottish voice, which even now to my memory is quite sweet, showed up, with the 'employment' statement.
That was the LAST time I was idle,or just pushing things along.because allison, maybe having read about the 'replacement' for her in this other woman whose legs I had compared to hers, decided to come with her own statement about, "Am I too early", and the link between THAT and the 'I'm too late' statement was too much to be coincidental.
And I went berserk.
till that time I had not worried much about anything, but when this woman who ignored me totally and took me like a fool and became on my guard and so, when this other woman showed up, and she won me over by her ... neglect.. of her kids and her very sexy appearance, and then she offered herself to me, I was really liking it.
Then that sunday I end up at the olympia cafe and she, seeing how things stand, decided to come out and clean her act, I saw, and decided to let it ride,but her act actually made me less angry with allison than I had been, and I thought that she could actually be less 'unclean' than this chick,so,when she showed up again, and again tried to disrupt my program with her self-importance, and I was further annoyed with her, I thought that at least she had stopped being too sure of herself, although if she ever tries to disrupt a program of mine ever again, I will KILL her, because I am fed up with her bullshit.
Anyway, that Sunday, when I had been pissed off, I saw this french lady who made up my mind for me that I could never have anything to do with the squid -chick who deliberately showed me up when she was the one who had come into my life, and now wanted to ... correct me?
Well, I decided she would die.
and then finally came the woman with her bland face and stunning body, and sweet smile, who only showed up when I decided that I would NOT have butt-head's mom anywhere near me, seeming respect or not.
And I decided that she would die, as well as her brood.
SOthese are the seven and three of the second tier, with the girl with the hail-mary mother as the bonus virgin.
Fuck, if she is NOT a virgin, then it would not be worth it to... spare her when she was privy to her mom's schemes and participated in them. Not even for her legs, no.Now, I am declaring the whole list done, the first ten, the second ten, and the five and one.
Now, I wonder if allison, the one I have a beedy eye on, because as far as I am concerned she is rather uncertain because I have had so much bullshit from HER which seems to point out that the woman really thinks I am an insect or some such thing.Well, I remember thinking about why she used to show up whenever I was on the road from Claremont and walking from Glencairn, and the one time the thing was I got this reply:-
me style are me style are nuh normal...
But fuck, listen to the song... I finally found it.
I like I like
girl me want you in my bed my bed
because me see say that you want me you want me
you want me yeah
me style me style nuh normal
girl me want you in my bed my bed
because me see say that you want me you want me
you want me yeah
me style me style nuh normal
girl are see me and are see me a phenomenal man
me swagger box say she want me for her man
see me suits see me shoes them say them wan' want.
me swagger box say she want me for her man
see me suits see me shoes them say them wan' want.
